Sunday, September 21, 2008


I woke up late.
I woke up slow.

I don't own a car anymore.

While brushing my teeth about ten minutes ago, I looked in the mirror and realized that last night, I slept in a shirt that read, "It took me 50 years to look this good!"
Something tells me it's going to be a good day.

Today, I am wearing the same thing I have been wearing for the last 4 days. Straight.
With the only addition of a reminder of where I have been.
Something I was afraid of for a while.
Something I hadn't wanted to put on just in case I would have to explain it.
Something I was too ashamed to wear proudly.

But my heart has been rediscovered and its stakes have been reclaimed.
And this, this is what is found inside.

A wrecked landscape for captives.
A holy mess.
A ravaged sense of self... often lost to many things much much less.
But continually pursued.
By Something so much More.

I have recently been informed that there is no need to worry about anything anymore.
In more ways than one.
Confirmation of spontaneous actions and whimsical decisions.
Whose roots were so much deeper than I realized at the time.

It is healthy.
It is right.
It is good.

It is purposed?
Maybe so.
Maybe not.
I guess we'll see.

The scene has shifted so many times already.
Why not shake it up again?

I feel as though I'm going home.

I'm on the edge of something here...
It's right there. Right underneath.
Waiting to take shape and take hold.
It has been waiting long enough.
I think this is what it has been waiting for.

It is brimming...
It is rising...
It is bursting forth...

The time is almost here for this beauty to become me.

Wait. Just a little bit longer.
Wait until the Lover calls you out.
Wait until He captivates you and draws you in.
Wait until He ransoms your captivity... and sends you out to do the same.
Your rescue is coming... horizon is on its way.

I promise, heart.
Horizon is now quickly on its way.

You can finally begin to hope.

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